He Will Never Learn

My husband will never learn.

We’ve been married 14 years and he still doesn’t get it.

Maybe it’s the fact that he grew up in a family with only two children. He doesn’t have the hoarding tendencies that those of us with many siblings learned.

Whatever the reason, he is still dumbfounded to come home to this.

When there is a bag of Oreos open in our house, EAT THEM RIGHT AWAY!

I tried to tell him. “Dear, I opened a bag of Oreos in the pantry. They are hiding on the top shelf so the kids don’t see them. You need to go ahead and eat some before I eat them all.”

TWO DAYS LATER he goes to look in the pantry and is stunned to find the cookies gone.

I mean, two days later? When I say you need to go ahead and eat some, I mean RIGHT NOW because I am heading to the pantry as we speak.

I know he thinks I should feel bad but I don’t.

I mean, I TOLD HIM.

But, I will try again just like I always do … Derek there is a candy bar hidden on the top shelf of the pantry…go eat some NOW.


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